KERRY WOOD SAYS: ONE & ONE COUNT, SIR

Kerry wood
by bsap11

Kerry Wood gives some double barrelled bird action on Saturday. It was actually an 0-2 count. Even good pitchers make mistakes on what the count is

THE CUBS MIGHT GET RID OF THE "L" FLAG?

There is an article in the Daily Herald today, saying that "The Cubs" are once again mulling over the idea of getting rid of "L" flag that is flown after losses at Wrigley Field. I put "The Cubs" in quotes like this because Bruce Miles doesn't name any particular person who told him about this story. It's just a guess but he's probably getting his info from the evil & hairless Mike Quade.



That's just a random guess, though.


At first when I read this article, I thought this idea was simply put out there because, let's face it, the Cubs rarely lose at home. The Cubs have lost 10 out of 42 games at home so far. The flag simply isn't getting any use and is probably taking up way too much room in the scoreboard. Miles writes that "The Cubs" or whomever believes that the flag "shouts out a loss," and then we respond with "no shit, that's what it's there for." Pretty soon, somebody from "The Cubs" will want to take down the division flags as well, as it shouts out "you suck, last place Cincinnati Reds" and I guess that's just plain mean.

Have the overly sensitive overstepped their bounds if the "L" flag is removed forever? Fuck & yes. It's just one of those weird quirks in MLB that's only done at Wrigley Field. Why would "The Cubs" try to take away yet another thing that makes Wrigley Field unique? Will it stop here? Will "The Cubs" continue on with their quest to make Wrigley Field as cookie-cutter as possible? When is the "Fundamentals" deck being installed? When is the video jumbotron being installed? Will there be races now at the 5th inning, with people getting into jumbo suits of famous corrupt Chicago & State politicians? (George Ryan would win every time. Rod Blagojavich would always lose because the helmet of hair would significantly slow down the runner) Where does this all stop?

And before you know it, the "W" flag will be taken down permanently, as it has shouted out too often lately, "Fuck you White Sox. We just beat you again." And that's just arrogant to do something like that.

WRITING IN A CAN: OPENED BY JACK ARMSTRONG, THE DENVER POST

Here we have yet another unoriginal rambling about the Chicago Cubs & their 2008 season, this time by Jack Armstong of The Denver Post. It's as if editor's across the country tell their feature writers that if you come upon writer's block or simply feel like mailing it in today, just write the same old stupid "curse" crap about the Chicago Cubs. It really bothers me because as a Cubs fan who knows many Cubs fans, I don't personally know a single one who believes in "curses" or blames Bartman and all that stupid crap. And I'm sick and tired of the media keeping this alive with articles like this.

Just so you know, I'm typing these words beneath a framed set of tickets to the 1984 World Series That Wasn't, the one the Cubs were in until Leon Durham kicked it all away.

The usual stereotype is that all Cubs fans blame losses on single plays. It's something the media, particularly ESPN, has pounded into the minds the world that Cubs fans obsess over certain plays & curses. It's simply not true. But as we can clearly see, it's just the easy thing to say when it comes to Cubs fans. If Jack Armstrong really is a Cubs fan & he blames Leon Durham for the series loss in 1984, then he is a retard.

Not that I'm still bitter about it all these years later. Not that I'm, you know, hoping Durham is living under a bridge somewhere.

Are you done, jackass?

Having been raised at Wrigley Field

lame comment. Also sounds like awful parenting.

they tell me I'm supposed to be excited about this 2008 season. They tell me next year, the one we've been waiting for for your basic century, has arrived.

Who's they? You're either excited or not. You don't need a "they" to let you know that the Cubs have the best team in the league, thus far. And as far as you're concerned, "they" also say you're an idiot. I told them that I already knew that.

Trouble is, I know too much.

Very, VERY doubtful.

I know where the skeletons of lost decades are buried.

The police are on line 1.

I know, given time, this isn't anything the Cubs can't screw up.

Obviously something bad could happen. It is, after all, ONLY JUNE. But what you also have to realize is that there is absolutely ZERO connection to events from year to year. So, obviously, something GOOD could happen. But keep pretending like there is some mysterious connection between the Cubs losing in the past and 2008, so that you can keep cranking out ridiculous shit you call "work" or "journalism."

But just to remind me of how adept they are at botching things, I also keep a framed picture of the '69 Cubs in my office. Beside the picture of Lou Brock in a Cubs uniform, circa 1964.

The sole purpose of having the pictures in your office is to remind you that the Cubs haven't done well or made the right decisions sometimes?

You.Sadistic.Fuck.

I could tell you more horror stories, but the point is, I'm not excited about what's going on in Wrigleyville.

Wait, I want to hear a horror story. Go back to the horror stories. I love a good story.

I have allowed myself the occasional smirk, but no smiles.

You really know how to cut loose when you're not writing pure crap.

I have suffered too many fools for too many seasons and heard too many excuses.

You JUST blamed the '84 playoffs on Leon Durham. Pot, meet kettle.

For years, I thought they were just talking in clichés, but now I know what all those athletes mean when they say they they're taking it one game at a time. One pitch at a time is more like it.

Again with the "they."

I must say, though, it's getting tougher by the day not to wonder about these Cubs.

Don't you DARE smile! You promised yourself you wouldn't smile!

The Cubs 4-1 favorites to win the World Series? Excuse me, did I wake up on the right planet? Those are by far the shortest odds in the National League. The Phillies are 12-1 the Mets 15-1 and the defending champion Rockies 50-1.

Common mistake made by a common idiot. Vegas in not in the prediction business. Vegas does NOT put up lines based on who they believe will win the World Series. Vegas initially puts up lines to draw action. Once action is seen, the Vegas oddsmakers will adjust on how the PUBLIC is betting. The line is based on who is receiving the most action by bettors. It's like this every single year. It will be like that every single year after this year.

Maybe it isn't all a mirage. The Red Sox did it, so maybe the Cubs can do it.

Does not make sense. You can't connect to random events like that. Do the directions in making your "Canned Article" say to make absurd associations like that?

Maybe this really is next year. Maybe they won't cough it up in September. Maybe they ...

What's that? Yeah, you're right.

Who's talking to you? Is it "they?"

Maybe I should just shut up.

Please do.

4th OF JULY/ SEPT. 11TH CUBS HATS ARE "MEH" AT BEST

The Cubs and the rest of MLB will wearing "Stars & Stripes hats" as a part of the "Welcome Back Veterans" program started by Fred Wilpon (owner of the Mets)on 4th of July and September 11th of this year.

I looked on the Cubs website and here's the hat:





They're ok I suppose. I'm sure they could have made them absolutely obnoxious if they wanted. I don't know if they'll be using different jerseys and pants, but if they need help with the pants, I suggest going with the traditional Zubaz:

BREAKING & SHOCKING: MIKE IMREM SPEWED SOME NONSENSE TODAY

Mike Imrem, a poor man's Jay Mariotti in Chicago, wrote his usual canned & ridiculous column today. I understand that's his job and the main focus of his articles is to attract readers with unusual opinions & viewpoints and sometimes utter nonsense, but he could at least do everyone a favor and at least do some research before writing.

Baseball is coming easy for the Cubs these days.

Too easy.

24 out of the Cubs 48 wins have been come from behind. How exactly is that "easy?" What's easy about getting behind in a ball game and then coming back? I would love to find out what is considered "hard." Spotting a team runs before the game starts?

It's obvious something has to go wrong.

As a veteran observer of "Cubbie occurrences," it's difficult for me to not believe the next one is imminent.

Yeah you're right Mike, nothing has gone wrong for the Cubs this season. Besides their superstar leftfielder going on the DL twice by June (Soriano), having a starting pitcher lose the strikezone in Chicago & Iowa (Hill), having an opening day centerfielder who can't hit in Chicago or Iowa (Pie), having 2 pitchers who suffer from Good Rex/Bad Rex syndrome this season (Lilly & Marquis), having a rookie in their starting rotation as early as May this season (Gallagher), having the league's best pinch hitter on the DL for what seems like forever, and having the staff ace on the DL, WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT THE CUBS DO GO THROUGH? HUH? WHAT ELSE?

Or, as "Cubbie occurrences" often go, Zambrano might be smacked around and his injury be season-threatening, career-threatening, heck, life-threatening.

Life threatening? Somebody has to die? You sick, sick bastard.

MYSTERIOUS, RUNNING CUBS FAN GETS AWAY!

According to the Sun-Times, there was a possibly crazed, possibly drunk, or possibly exercising Cubs fan that was seen running along the Kennedy late last night.

State police received about a half a dozen calls after a man wearing a Chicago Cubs T-shirt was seen running on the shoulder of the Kennedy Expressway late Sunday on the North Side.

By about 11:40 p.m., State Police had received about a half a dozen calls about the man, who was seen running on the shoulder of the inbound Kennedy Expressway (I-90/94) near Addison Street, according to Illinois State Police District Chicago Master Sgt. Joe Stangl.

Multiple state police units responded after the calls were received, according to ISP District Chicago Trooper Mark Hall. By early Monday at 12:20 a.m. the runner had apparently left the scene.

“He didn’t get hit [by a vehicle] and we didn’t arrest him,’’ according to Stangl.

So 6 calls were made about a Cubs fan running in the middle of the street and it took the police 40 MINUTES to arrive on the scene? I demand an investigation. Obviously it was a big deal, or the Sun-Times wouldn't have put this on their website.

So what took the cops so long? I would make a joke that the police were probably dealing with real criminals (Sox fans), but they just got swept after talking a ton of shit for a week. So we won't pile on, for now.

And who do you think the crazed, running Cubs fan was on the Kennedy?

That's right, Ronnie Woo Woo.

14 WINS IN A ROW AT HOME

On May 17th, I sat in the very first row behind home plate. They were the best seats I have ever been in & I'm not sure there are seats any better throughout the entire ballpark. I may never sit in seats that good ever again, and with the way things are going, I may never be allowed to sit in those seats ever again.

During that Saturday afternoon, Carlos Marmol gave up a 2 run homer to Nate McClouth, during the top of the 9th, to break a 5-5 tie with the Pittsburgh Pirates. The Cubs would go on to score 1 during the bottom of the 9th, but would end up losing after Derrek Lee's deep drive to right field was caught on the warning track to end the game.

Since that Saturday, the Cubs haven't lost at Wrigley Field.

Today is June 23rd, 37 days since that loss to the Pirates. The Cubs are 14-0 during that time, with win # 14 coming at the hands of the White Sox. The Cubs swept the Sox for the second straight series, and have now won 9 out of the last 10 games against the Sox. The Cubs now have a 4.5 game lead over the Cardinals, the biggest lead the Cubs have had in the division so far this season.

And after a week where the Sox organizations made fools of themselves (Kenny, Ozzie, Danks, A.J., Vazquez) by running their mouths over and over again, the Cubs simply retaliated with their great bats, great pitching, and great fielding. Maybe it's best for the White Sox to just shut their mouths now.


The Magic number is down to 82.

The Cubs now play the Baltimore Orioles at Wrigley starting tuesday. I'm sure the Chicago media will pound the Brian Roberts/spring training trade rumors the next 4 days. All I wish is that the Cubs could play the Orioles this weekend, preferably Sunday.

And I promise, I won't sit in the first row until the Cubs finally lose one at home.

JOHN DANKS IS CLASSY

''We'll all be bringing our nose plugs, try not to smell all the urine over there,'' Danks said Thursday. ''Nah, we're looking to have fun over there, but that place is a [bleep] hole.''

This type of stupidity must be something that they teach in the Chicago White Sox organization. They must be told on day 1 with the organization that they need to exhibit the same type of class as their fans, which is display as little as class as possible. Meanwhile, the Cubs organization does not respond to Kenny, Ozzie, and the rest of the scumbag organization.

UNI-WATCH PROFILES THE CUBS UNIQUE UNIFORM STYLES

Cool article on uniforms you've seen & remember, uniforms you've seen & forgotten, & other info on the Cubs uniforms you may have never known about.

OZZIE GUILLEN IS WELL AWARE OF THE CUBS' EUROPEAN FANBASE

"One thing about Sox fans, they show up and watch the game," Guillen said. "Some people go to Wrigley Field -- I'm not going to say everyone -- some people go to Wrigley Field from Europe and Paris and want to have a tour of the game. No one wants to have a tour here. They're legit fans."

I'm not even sure what the hell that means. Cubs do not have legit fans because some of them are Europeans? Wha?


Oh and you can take tours of U.S. Cellular Field. And while I've never been on a U.S. Cellular Field tour, I would imagine that they are offering it because people go on them. So for those fans who go on tours at U.S. Cellular Field, Ozzie Guillen doesn't think you're legit.

THE ANSWER HAS ARRIVED TO KENNY WILLIAMS' "ANNIVERSARY" COMMENT

As contributer RYAN points out, this week actually marks a big anniversary, the anniversary that Kenny Williams was probably talking about. His comment yesterday didn't really make any sense at the time, given that it was June 18 and the Cubs were't celebrating anything significant on that day. But it turns out Kenny wasn't lying about the anniversary. I'm not sure why he would direct it towards Cubs fans, but maybe this is a newer, friendlier Kenny Williams.

Here's what we're all celebrating: 50 Years of the Hula Hoop.


Happy Anniversary to you too, Kenny!!!!!

JOE COWLEY NEEDS TO DO SOME ACTUAL RESEARCH

One of the biggest misconceptions made about the Cubs & White Sox "rivalry" is that the media usually depicts the Cubs as the Major Market team in the city and that the White Sox operate as a small market team. The Cubs are usually looked at as the big conglomerate that throws money at every free agent that they can get their hands on & the White Sox are the type of team that nickels & dimes their way in putting a roster together. Today, Joe Cowley makes the same stupid mistake, as usual.

Early in his career as GM, talks of budget constraints would creep up. So hours before the Sox played the Pittsburgh Pirates, Williams was asked -- if the opportunity presented itself -- if he could imagine ever being GM of the deep-pocketed, throw-money-at-every-hole Cubs.

''That would be a betrayal,'' Williams said before a long pause. ''God, I would really, really have to need the job. Oh, wow, really need the job.''

If he could ever imagine being the GM of the deep-pocketed, throw money-at-every-hole Cubs? Interesting, because according to ESPN, the White Sox have a higher payroll than the Chicago Cubs. In fact, the White Sox have the 5th highest payroll in the league.

When will media members like Joe Cowley ever do some research? If the question really needed to be asked, Joe Cowley, it should have been: "Kenny, what would it feel like to have the same job with the same payroll, just with different players in a different part of town?" Then, Joe Cowley, would your column actually be accurate.

SOX FANS TRAVEL WITH THEIR OWN SECURITY CREW?

According to Fred Mitchell, the White Sox will be sending their security over to Wrigley Field this weekend to help out the Cubs security crew. It's a little terrifying that a fanbase actually has security follow them to the ballpark.

SOMEBODY GET KENNY WILLIAMS A CALENDAR

''The unfortunate thing for me is it's a shame that a certain segment of Chicago refused to enjoy a baseball championship being brought to their city. The only thing I can say is, 'Happy anniversary.'''

That's the message to Cubs fans from White Sox GM Kenny Williams. I've been looking though White Sox & Cubs history of what anniversary Kenny Williams is talking about that happened on June 18th. I keep looking & looking & looking and I'm not coming up with anything.


So is Kenny Williams saying that if the Cubs make it to the World Series this year and win it, he'll be celebrating along with the Cubs fans? Because that's what it sounds like Kenny says we should have been doing in 2005. Once again it brings up the same old question, why do Sox figures in their organization care so much about the Cubs & Cubs fans? Why does it bother them so much that we're not paying attention to them? Does Kenny want us to come to their games so they can actually fill up their park? Is Kenny expecting Cubs GM Jim Hendry to set up a press conference today to respond to him? No he won't be doing that. You know why? Because Jim Hendry doesn't give a shit about the White Sox or Kenny Williams. Nor does anybody else.

And if anybody can let me know what happened on June 18th that Kenny Williams is celebrating the anniversary of, that would be great. I don't want to be rude and not get Kenny a card on this momentous occasion.

NO HALL OF FAME GAME AFTER ALL

So the giant pain in the ass for the Cubs gets kind of worse, because it turns out they won't even play the game at all. Rain has forced the game's cancellation and the Cubs will just move on to Tampa Bay now. So on the Cubs now sort of day off, they basically took a team field trip to Cooperstown together.

At least they'll now get to watch the end of the U.S. Open.

MARK DEROSA MAY WANT TO RE-PHRASE

Looking at Mark DeRosa's blog today, The Pulse, I came across a couple sentences that Mark DeRosa may want to edit. Or maybe not I guess, not that there's anything wrong with that.

L.A.'s always fun. Vince Vaughn was sitting in the front row of the game on Sunday. Every guy on our team was trying to make eye contact with him.

The Cubs did win that game on Sunday, so I guess Lou's game plan for winning from now on will have to be: Get great starting pitching, great fielding, timely hitting, and send "fuck-me eyes" to the local male celebrities in the crowd. Whatever, as long as the Cubs win the World Series.

WHITE SOX FANS MAKE GOD CRY

So I live in a Southwest Suburb of Chicago. I take the Rock Island into the city every morning to go to work, and occassionally I will overhear baseball conversations between all sorts of people. Men, women, children, and even the train conductors themselves will start up conversations with people about the Cubs or Sox.

As everybody knows, Alfonso Soriano got hurt last night. A picture of Alfonso Soriano, kneeling in pain, was on the back of the Sun-Times today.

For the most part in the morning on the train on the way into the city, most people read the newspaper and mind their own business (on the way home is a different story = we're done with work, let's booze). Today was a sad day for me and really the rest of the world because there is no hope for White Sox fans apparently.

One of the train conductors was making his way through checking tickets, doing his usual thing. When he's finished, he'll talk to anybody that'll listen as we all await our arrival into the station. Today, however, was a little different. Instead of his usual ramblings to some poor old lady, this jackass was holding up the Sun-Times picture of Soriano and walking up and down the train saying, "Let me hear you White Sox fans, how awesome is this?" and high fiving passengers. What makes it even more pathetic is that, in my car alone, 7 people high fived him.

I was too shocked at the time to even say anything. This wasn't like Michael Irvin getting hurt against the Philadephia Eagles, when Eagles fans booed Irvin as he was being put on a stretcher. Those 2 teams fight it out for the same division title every year. How could people celebrate an injury that happened to a team the Sox play 6 times in a year? Why do Sox fans have such an unbridled hardon for everything Cubs? How can one fanbase have so much hatred for another fanbase that barely even knowledges it's existence? Is it because Cubs fans for the most part don't care what happens with the White Sox that angers White Sox fans so much? Should we care how the Sox are doing this season? Will the world ever understand the White Sox fans inferiority complex they suffer so mightily from? (Especially considering the inferiority complex involves a team that hasn't won a World Series the past 99 seasons) I don't think so. I really don't think so.

THE CUBS WILL SURVIVE WITHOUT ALFONSO SORIANO

As soon as Alfonso Soriano got hit in the hand last night, you knew it was DL time. You just knew it because of the way Alfonso Soriano is put together. Alfonso Soriano appears to have 0% body fat, meaning he's bascially skin and bones on certain parts of his body, particularly his hands. The way he stands so close to the plate, I guess it was only a matter of time. What makes you mad is that this is one of those weird injuries that you have absolutely no control over. Pulled a muscle? You need stretch better. Cramps? Drink more water. Broken finger from sliding head first? Don't slide head first. Getting hit in the hands with a fast ball, however, is an injury you can't prevent. A batter barely has enough time to react to any pitch, let alone a pitch coming at his gourd. Soriano is one of those good hitters that feast on hanging breaking balls, so he waits & doesn't give up on a single pitch coming his way. In a way, this was his downfall. In a way, this is what causes him to swing at EVERY breaking pitch, which has driven Cubs fans bonkers at times. In a way, it's also made him a very rich man because when it is a hanging mistake, Soriano and his quick little stick wrists can bash that mistake into the seats.

Obviously, this is bad news. The Cubs have the best offense in Major League Baseball. Losing Soriano will hurt. However, unlike the injury to Derrek Lee in 2006 that essentially killed the Cubs season and allowed an 83 win St. Louis Cardinals team win the NL Central (and, ugh, World Series), this injury to Alfonso Soriano will not kill the season. This Cubs team has way too many weapons to suddenly have a stagnant offense without Soriano.

In 2006, Derrek Lee was THE weapon the Cubs had, along with Aramis Ramirez. In 2008, Alfonso Soriano, one of the best offensive outfielders in the NL, is A weapon in the Cubs offense. Soriano is just a part. The Cubs will still have one of the best hitting first baseman in the league. The Cubs will still have one of the best hitting third baseman in the league. The Cubs will still have, as the Sun-Times says, one of the best hitting 2B/SS combo in the league. The Cubs still have one of the best hitting catchers in the league. The Cubs still have one of the smartest hitting right fielders in the league. The Cubs still have the best ERA in the league. The Cubs still have Howry/Marmol/Wood anchoring their bullpen.

Will the Cubs be able to replace Soriano's instant offense with Murton/Hoffpauir/Patterson/Pie or whoever they bring up? Absolutely not. But what you have to remember, unlike any Cubs team I've ever seen, this team is stacked.

So we say, take your time Soriano and come back full strength or as close to it as you can get (unlike the last time you came off the DL). The Cubs will be all right without you. When Soriano does come back in 6 weeks or whenever, it'll be like cheating. The Cubs machine will be adding another devastating offensive weapon as they gear up for a playoff run.

DEMPSTER IS A BONAFIDE #2 STARTER; CUBS MAGIC NUMBER DOWN TO 94

Ryan Dempster put on quite a show last night, striking out 11 batters in a complete game outing, as the Cubs won 7-2. Ryan Dempster is now 8-2 this season, with all 8 wins coming while pitching at Wrigley. His performance, unfortunately, was overshadowed by Alfonso Soriano's broken hand. More on that in a different post.

Is Ryan Dempster's splitter the most devastating pitch any Cubs pitcher has in their repetoire right now? Carlos Zambrano has his nasty sinker, Kerry Wood has his devastating curveball, and Carlos Marmol has his wiffle ball-like slider, but I would contend that Ryan Dempster is definitely starting to make a name for himself with that splitter that just falls off the table. Dempster's splitter is reminiscient of Roger Clemen's splitter or John Smoltz's out pitch, where it comes in looking like a fastball & then suddenly nosedives as it comes into the hitting zone. The pitch is impossible to lay off and even harder to hit. If a hitter does get a piece of it, it's either a foul tip back to the catcher or a weak groundball. The more Ryan Dempster uses that pitch, the more he makes the case that he should be at this year's All-Star game and the Cubs bonafide #2 starter with actual #2 starter stuff.

Ryan Dempster, after 14 starts, has a 2.81 ERA and a 1.059 WHIP. The only blemish this season? His inability to win on the road. However, as the sabermetric guys would tell you, you can't judge a pitcher on the number of wins. Dempster, so far this season on the road, is 0-2 in 5 starts. In those 5 starts, however, he has a 2.59 ERA, he's only given up 20 hits in 31 innings, and he's only averaging 2 walks per start. One start involved a Kerry Wood blown save, 3 starts involved the Cubs only scoring 3, 3, & 2 runs, and his last road start was a blown lead by the bullpen. So it's not like Dempster has been pitching poorly on the road. Dempster could very easily have 10 wins this season already.

CUBS MAGIC NUMBER DOWN TO 98

And the Magic Number is under 3 digits!

Cubs win again last night, but not before Kerry Wood pulled a Joe Borowski/Ryan Dempster (closer days-Ryan Dempster) and made the save as difficult as possible on the Cubs and the fans. Kerry Wood, however, was able to blow some serious cheese past Matt Kemp to close out the game. One more win in the next 2 games and the Cubs will have a success road trip in what seems like years.

If you're feeling good about the Cubs, Gordon Wittenmyer of the Chicago Sun-Times does what he can to rain on your parade. For one day, can we go without a list of reasons why the Cubs won't win the World Series?

- The Sun-Times is running a poll on who reader's think has a hotter fanbase of women, Cubs fans or Sox fans. Right now, the Cubs fans are jamming to an easy victory in the poll, but to be fair, it's because Sox fans can't read. And I don't think the drunk-tank at 26th & California gets a good internet connection. And it is 9AM and it's not like Sox fans have jobs, so they're probably still sleeping. So I expect the poll to start evening out around 2PM.

- One of our favorite blogs to read, Hire Jim Essian, made a hilarious post about ignorant Sox fans yesterday. Sox fans caught wind and hit up their comment board. And what do you know, the Sox fans were ignorant. Go figure.

WILL LEN KASPER GROW A MUSTACHE IF THE CUBS WIN TONIGHT?

I was unable to watch last night's, so this may have been talked about by Len & Bob, so I apologize for coming late to the party.

Yesterday afternoon on Len & Bob's blog, a small note was mentioned about a fan email answer by Len to a reader in 2005 read that if the Cubs were to win 10 games in a row or win 90 or more in the season, Bob would shave his mustache and Len would grow one. With the Cubs going for #10 in a row later on tonight, we here at Out of Right Field are anxiously awaiting both the game and Len's decision to possibly honor his 2005 season promise in 2008 and sport a lip awning if the Cubs win tonight.

Contributor Ryan put together a projection of what Len Kasper would look like with a mustache:



Please Len, please grow a cookie duster if the Cubs win tonight. You think everybody loves Bob Brenly because he's an intelligent former MLBer, World Series winning manager, and entertaining color analyst for the Cubs? Absolutely not. Just look above his lip to find the real reason everybody loves him.

CUBS MAGIC NUMBER DOWN TO 100

9 in a row. The Cubs are now 17 games over .500, after 59 games. They are currently on pace to win 104 games. Even Jay Mariotti is slowly turning into a believer.


And do you think Lou Piniella and the Cubs sent Michael Barrett a nice message yesterday? The Cubs stole 6 bases against Barrett last night, who went 1 for 5 and lowered his average to .184. Meanwhile, the guy who replaced Michael Barrett, Geovany Soto, hit his 10th homer of the year. Soto is also the leading vote getter for NL Catchers by a huge margin right now.


And for those Cubs haters that are waiting for the annual "June Swoon:" 3-0 so far.

THE CHICAGO SUN-TIMES COULDN'T RESIST WITH GOAT STORY

A goat randomly showed up in a backyard in Cicero in May, so naturally, the Chicago Sun-Times makes a connection that the goat appeared to help break the curse of the goat on the Chicago Cubs. Wow. And this classifies as news? Somebody finds a goat in their yard and it's time to alert the presses? If I find a black cat in my yard, do I call the Sun-Times? If I see Steve Bartman in my backyard, do I call the Sun-Times? If I run over Steve Garvey with my car and drag him into my backyard, do I call the Sun-Times? If I find anything in my backyard that may or may not resemble any sort of "curse" in my backyard, do I immediately call the Sun-Times?

I really want the Cubs to win the World Series this year & every year because I'm a fan of the Chicago Cubs baseball team. However, I also want the Cubs to finally win a World Series so we can stop reading or listening to the same stupid ass stories the media in Chicago and the rest of the world love to write about when it comes to the Cubs. I mean any day now, some jackass writer in the city is going to write about Steve Bartman. Some writer will want to get out of doing actual journalism and do the same cut & paste job because while the Cubs still haven't won a World Series since 1908, these same stupid stories are relevant according to the media.

Any day now.

Any day now we'll see a Bartman story.

Any day n--... what was that?

Oh you've got to be kidding me.

CUBS MAGIC NUMBER DOWN TO 101

So how many of you thought Michael Barrett's flyout to leftfield in the 9th was gone last night? I certainly did. We had just reached the 1 year anniversary of the "Michael Barrett/Carlos Zambrano fight" this past Sunday & it appeared for a second that Barrett would get some sort of revenge against the Cubs. He didn't, thankfully, and the Cubs win 7-6.

- Carlos Marmol gave up another homer in the 9th inning, this time to Adrian Gonzalez. Is the best reliever in the game fatigued right now? Marmol doesn't think so, because Marmol believes Gonzalez got lucky.